"Feminist" is a Scary Word

I will always remember my lower division electromagnetism class in physics. That was the ONE time I EVER had a female physics professor at UCSD. 

I remember the few females I had in my class emphasizing that they were females in a hard science (as opposed to a soft science). They did this often. They stated it as if they wished to invoke not just a camaraderie amoungst some of the other females in the class but, as if to beg the same of society. The young women spoke as if they were taking a deep leap on behalf of woman kind-- for MAN-kind, maybe.

I do not remember everything about the conversation those ladies were having. I had been inadvertently eavesdropping. However, my female physics professor had interjected into their conversation. Suddenly, my interest was fully aroused. I do not remember the words they spoke but, I do remember the meaning. They spoke of feminist values. In fact, one of the females there felt compelled to state (very tangentially, I might add) that she was a fighter. She fought for a team, in fact. 

I felt compelled to join in. I stated that I was a feminist. Boy, were their facial expressions and body language anything but subtle! All the young women seemed like their minds were blown: almost like I proudly announced I were a racist or something! This look of uncomfortable amusement was plastered onto their face; they became very jittery. Like they thought: "No one is supposed to SAY that!"

Fortunately, I have ALWAYS possessed the ability to stand outside myself and to stand outside of a situation. I, too, grew very amused! 

I asked "What?!" in a sort of playfully, rhetorical way. I had hoped that they WOULD answer. As, my fundamental belief was that the belief in "rhetorical questions" is an insult to the mind. I believe that ALL questions merit answering. Regardless, I knew the OTHERS would interpret it as such. No one would venture to answer.

Most interestingly enough was the starkly different manner in which my professor acted. She was calm and cool. She made little movement. She did, however, make LOTS of eye-contact. There was a sort of twinkle in her eyes-- like she understood my underlying message. Even with my pronouncement of "What?!" she understood me. As though, she knew of my own knowledge of the fact that others detested when one identifies as being a Feminist. As is she KNEW that THIS is WHY I am so committed to announcing it: Because if people are so scarred of identifying themselves as feminists, then the problem is deep, real, and NEEDS to be addressed!!!!!!